Decide and Live Your Dream

“The moment you decide to pursue your dream is the moment you begin to live it.” -gruberism

On a recent trip back to Ohio, while visiting my sister Pat and her family, Eli, the youngest of her three boys ran up to me and asked if I would go fish’n with him. Looking out the window and seeing the sun gently set, I replied, “Not tonight, it’s getting dark. How about we go fishing tomorrow?” Excited by my answer, he ran off to tell his brothers.

As the night progressed, I couldn’t help but notice that Eli seemed a little happier than usual. Curious, I playfully asked, “Hey buddy, what are so happy about?”

He replied with joy, “I’m fish’n.”

“Not tonight. It’s way too late. Tomorrow we’ll go down to the pond and fish.” I replied.

Looking up at me like I just didn’t get it, he lovingly explained, “Fish’n don’t start at the pond, Silly. Fish’n starts when you decide you’re gonna fish. And we decided.”

Humbled by his insight, I smiled and conceded, “You got me there kid.”

In my nephew’s wise little head, he began fish’n the moment it was decided. He continued fish’n, as he went to bed, as he woke up and as walked around the pond to his favorite spot. He was even fish’n as he reeled in a clump of algae. And if you were ask him what he was doing as he walked home from the pond that day, he would tell you he was still fish’n, because he knew that walking back home was just as much a part of fish’n as catching the big one.

An Inquiry

What are your dreams?
Have you decided to experience/pursue/live any of them yet?
If so, are you allowing yourself to enjoy each every step along the way?
If you haven’t yet, can you now begin to see how all those little steps are part of your dream?

Copyright 2008 Rob Gruber

Present Life Mastery Coach

i wish i could tell you

Awaken Your Inspiration!

Within all of us lies something quite magical, loving and uniquely our own, we need merely to awaken it!

About five years ago, I picked up a magazine featuring a series of articles on some of the world’s most creative minds. Just as I was finishing the last article, it occurred to me. All of them had one thing in common. They all had their own very unique way of getting their inspirations out of their heads and into the world in a moment’s notice. One designer went so far as to resurface his workspace with a blackboard type material.

Inspired by his genius, I decided to cover the walls of my workspace with artfully hung, clusters of dry erase boards. I cannot begin to describe the sense of freedom and assurance I have felt since the moment I hung my first board. Over the years, I have filled my boards with anything from gibberish and doodles to bouts of inspiration that have profoundly changed the way I look at and love my life.

You too can Awaken Your Inspiration!

1. Open up your journal and write a love letter to your inspiration, inviting it to take a more active part along your path of growth.

2. Develop a way to take notes and record what your inspiration is telling you throughout your day. When I’m not in my workspace, I carry a pen and pad.

3. Schedule a time to meet with your inspiration each day. The morning works best for me. Find a quiet space, close your eyes, relax your breathing and imagine your inspiration coming forth in anyway it feels comfortable. Once you feel it is present, have a conversation with it. When you are finished speaking with it, thank it for coming and invite it to visit or stay with you throughout your day. (I’ve also had a great deal of success working with my inspiration, when I am doing things that require little thought, like washing the dishes or brushing my teeth.)

4. Listen to the many subtle and loving cues you are receiving from your alignment with your inspiration.

“Wisdon that remains in the mind as an idea, rather than being incorporated into the tapestry of who we are, cannot change us.”
– Joan Borysenko, Guilt is the Teacher, Love is the Answer

Copyright 2008
Rob Gruber Life Mastery Coach

Interested in being coached toward a life of Self-Mastery?
Email me at rob@iwishicouldtellyou.com!

Run Barefoot on the Grass!

If I were to ask you to finish the statement, “The grass is always greener,” you would mostly likely answer “on the other side of the fence.” Am I right?

Now, how did I know that? Could it be that I, like you, have accepted this seemingly harmless idiom as true, made it a part of my belief system, and am now able to rattle it off whenever called to do so? Well, yeah. That’s exactly how I did it.

Unfortunately, this widely accepted idiom is wrong. The grass, a metaphor for life, is not, nor ever will be, greener on the other side. “The grass is always greener under your feet.”

The reason I say this is because the grass you are standing on is where you are now, and where you are now is where you are able to grow, love and experience life.

That grass on the other side can’t offer that. It is but a reflection of light we have been misled to believe is greater that us and that is simply not true. Making it, in my opinion, a lighter shade of green.

So run barefoot on the grass and know that it’s always greener under your feet.

______________________

A Present Moment Exercise – Questioning Beliefs

1. Monitor your thoughts and language throughout the week.
2. Catch yourself when you begin to express beliefs that require little thought or effort to express.
3. Take a moment to ask yourself the following questions:
Did I create this belief or was it given to me by society?
Is it true or false?
If it’s false, could I create a new, better and more loving belief to replace the old one?

I realize questioning your beliefs may feel a bit uncomfortable at first, but I assure “an unexamined idiom is not worth living.” gruberism

Claim your Presence in “The iwicty Registry”

Hello Folks,

Today I would like to announce a new collaborative page called The iwicty Registry.

It is here you will be able to claim your very presence in the here and now!

Simply click on the folder tab above marked “The iwicty Registry” and sign the registry.

Carpe Praesentium!

Sincerely,

Rob Gruber

Copyright 2008 Rob Gruber

Present Life Mastery Coach

i wish i could tell you

Once Upon a Present Moment

Once upon a present moment, an old queen looked into her mirror and asked, “Mirror, mirror on the wall, whose the fairest of them all?”

The mirror answered back, “I am the fairest, reflecting only what I see.”

Enraged by the mirror’s answer she exclaimed, “That’s not what I meant. Who is the most beautiful?”

“Still it is I,” said the mirror, “reflecting only what I see. What could be more beautiful than that?

The queen, angered by the mirror’s answer, threw it on the ground, breaking it into a thousand pieces screaming, “Now what do you have to say for yourself?

The thousand broken pieces answered back in a thousand tiny voices, “I am still the fairest, reflecting only what I see.”

Refusing to listen to the mirror’s many voices, the queen ordered all the mirrors in her kingdom to be destroyed and buried far, far away.

———————————————————-

I realize that this may seem like a simple play on words, but it’s not. To see things as they truly are is a beautiful thing. And as easy as it seems, it’s not, and we humans rarely do it.

A Mirroring Exercise

1. Go to a busy place you feel comfortable, like a café, and write in your journal everything you see in the most descriptive way you know how. Describe what others are doing around you. What you think they do for a living? How do you feel about them? Describe the environment and setting in great detail. (Do this for about fifteen minutes.)

2. Now I want you to do the exact opposite and write in your journal what is going on in front of you in its purest and most generic sense. Avoid using adjectives and adverbs or anything descriptive. Use only rudimentary nouns and verbs. Simply record what is in front of you without any imagining, discerning, judging or evaluating. To simply describe someone as male or female is too descriptive for this exercise. i.e., person walking, man standing, couple holding hands, machine making noise, wind blowing, door moving, sign flashing. (Do this for about fifteen minutes.)

The second part of this exercise may seem odd or difficult at first, but with some practice, you may find it quite liberating or even peaceful to see things as they simply are.

“All of life is within a stone’s throw.” gruberism

Copyright 2008 Rob Gruber Life Coach

i wish i could tell you

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Live a more Balanced Life. Create a Two-do List.

You’re always busy doing everything you can to succeed. You make your lists and manage your time, but still, you feel out of balance.

Add a little balance back into you life with a Two-Do List!

The Goal of the Two-Do List

To create a system to get you to focus all the areas of your life.

The Process

Build a Foundation. (To be done monthly)

1. Write down in your journal where you are in each area of your life.
2. Now, write down in detail where you wish to be, how you would feel being where you wish to be and some of the ways you could get there.
3. Answer the big Why? Write down why it is important to you?
4. Do this exercise until you have addressed each important area of you life.

Make Your List

1. Choose between five and eight areas of your life, from your journaling, you wish to work the next day.
2. Create a list of action steps you could take to further your growth in each area.
3. Pick two action steps from each area.
4. On a clean sheet of paper list the areas you have chosen and the two action steps you have chosen for each area.

Follow the Rules

1. Take Action. Work off your list.
2. Once you have completed two tasks from a particular area of your life move on to the other areas you have chosen to work on that day.
3. Once you have completed one action step from each area on your list you can refill your entire list, complete the existing list or just go about your day, satisfied with your ability to have addressed every area of your list in one day.

The Skills You Will Strengthen

Self-Awareness
Balance
Time management
Visualization
Imagination
Creativity

Copyright 2007 Rob Gruber Life Coach

i wish i could tell you

Harness the Power of Questions!

I am often asked, “What do you think?” I often reply, “You’re asking the wrong person.”

Did you know you can begin to live the life you want by asking yourself questions?

Try this technique I call “A Book of Questions.”

A Book of Questions is a series of questions created by you to challenge your current thinking patterns and habitual actions in a particular segment of your life.

Here’s an example. Before initiating a personal everyday action I often run through “A Book of Questions” that goes something like this:

Do I really want this? Will it make my life better or worse? Will this bring me closer to I want in my life? Is this in-line with my vision, goals, values and beliefs? Is there anything else I could be doing in this moment that would bring me closer to what I want to be, do and have? In essense, is this the most loving thing I can imagine doing in this moment?

An amazing aspect of “A Book of Questions” is that once you create the list of questions and incorporate them into your everyday life, your questions are answered instantly, even before they’re asked? Your brain works that fast.

During an everyday action I ask questions like these:

Am I getting the results that I want? Could I shift my thoughts or actions a bit to get better results? If I’m not getting the results I desire, would I consider stopping and choosing another action?

At the completion of an action, I ask questions like these:

Did I grow from this? Was it worth the precious moments that it took up? Would I do it again?

Start with one aspect of your life and create a series of questions that challenge you to grow based on your relationship to you and that subject.

This technique works in every aspect and situation in your life.

Socrates once said, “An unexamined life is not worth living.” While I wouldn’t go that far, I would say that an examined life is much more fulfilling.

Copyright 2007 Rob Gruber iwishicouldtellyou i wish i could tell you

It’s a Wonder-full Life!

It’s official, there are 7 New Wonders of the world. It’s all over the news.

So I wondered…Why only seven and what was wrong with the old ones? Did they lose their wonder? Who got to decide and why wasn’t I asked?

In all this wondering, I came to the conclusion that there are an infinite number of wonders in my own little world that I witness and experience every day.

So I got out my journal and wrote at the top of a page “Seven Wonders of My World” and began writing about those things in my world that leave me with a sense of wonder and awe.

I did this every day for a week and then weekly after that. I will admit I did not follow my own direction. I didn’t stop at seven. I saw the number seven as more of a guideline.

Try this exercise to create a wonder-full life. I think it works best at the end of the day.

1.Get your journal out and write at the top of the page, “Seven Wonders of my World.”
2.Write down everything that fills you with a sense of wonder, awe, admiration, peace, joy or gratitude.
3. Do this everyday for a week and then once a week after that.

You may start off slow but once you get going you will begin to open up to the wonder of your world. Don’t take anything for granted.

To help you get started, here are a few of the things I recognized as wonders of my world.

My father’s courage to get two titanium knee replacements, his strength to undergo physical therapy and the technology behind the whole process, my mother’s ability to play 36 bingo cards and not have a nervous breakdown, my sister’s courage to work as a missionary, the simplicity and power of my Mac, the gift of waking up to a new day to live, laugh and love, my dear friend’s ability to survive her cancer, caramel coffee, the smoothness of this table and sturdiness of this chair, those who work toward peace, solar energy, the level sidewalk outside my home, organic foods, the mountains I live at the foot of, the cactus that will not die on me, my one pair of comfortable shoes, the world that keeps turning, the sun that keeps burning, the design of mass transit, electricity, rescue workers, the kindness of strangers, peace.

Now it’s your turn, what are the wonders of your world?

Copyright 2007 Rob Gruber iwishicouldtellyou i wish i could tell you

Create a Compelling Future!

There are numerous studies that show that goal setting works, but few people actually set goals. Why is this? One response, or excuse, I often get from my clients is that they don’t know where to start.

Today I would like to turn goal setting on its head and start at its very end.

Whether we like to think about it or not, we are all going to die someday – the later the better, of course. Upon our death, someone will write an obituary, a notice of death that will include a biography of your life.

What would your obituary say?

What if you could write your own obituary?

Today, I would like you to do just that and create a probituary. A probituary is an obituary written by you detailing every amazing and significant thing you will have accomplished or experienced in your life.

1) Open your journal and write down at the top of the page. “My current probituary”
2) Write in detail everything you wish to be, do and have before you die in autobiographical form. Describe how you lived, how you loved, how others loved you, the millions of people you positively touched, the family and life you created, the places you visited and the wealth you created. Did you have an estate, a collection of cars or a foundation? Were you an educator, an entrepreneur, an accomplished artist, a philanthropist and/or a loving parent? Did you find a cure for diabetes or cancer? How did you positively change the world? Did you lose that weight, change and/or grow? Did you give up your addictions? This is not a time to be humble, simple or modest. Think big. Dream big. See it. Feel it. Get emotional. Proclaim, exclaim, sing, shout and announce what you have accomplished.
3) Now, write down what others will write about you. Did the president seek you out fro advice or Oprah praise your endeavors? Did your family cherish every moment you were here? Will there be a day set aside to honor the contributions you made to the world? Were loved ones reunited? Write down their testimonials.
4) Make a list of all the things you accomplished in your probitaury.
5) With this compelling list, write down your short and long-range goals. Ask yourself, “What can I do in this moment, this day, this week and this year to fulfill each of these goals?
6) Once a series of action steps are created, stay present and open to the signs that will lead you to the fulfillment of each and every goal. Monitor your progress and always be grateful for each moment given to you to reach your goals.
7) Revisit or recreate your probituary whenever you feel the need.

Copyright 2007 Rob Gruber iwishicouldtellyou.com i wish i could tell you

From Idealist to Idea List Maker…How to live a fuller life!

Stop being an idealist and become an idea list maker!

What’s the difference you ask? Well, a lot!

Idealists…
Aim for perfection.
Rarely achieve the perfection they seek.
Pass up many comparable opportunities.
Wait most of their life for ideal situations.
Never appreciate anything outside their ideal.

Idea List Makers…
Think in concepts.
See endless possibilities.
Embrace new experiences.
Enjoy the process of creating.
Don’t wait around for perfect conditions.
Live fuller and happier lives.

Now, throw out your old ideals and become an idea list maker!

1) Get out your journal or create a new one entitled, “My Idea List Maker,” or better yet, “My Book of Possibilities.”
2) Write down at the top of each page “These are the kinds of things I aspire to be, do, have in my life. ”
3) Write for five to ten minutes in detail.
4) Do this at least once a week.

You can repeat things on your list each week. The goal of the exercise is to help you discover what you truly want while training yourself to keep an open mind.

Copyright 2007 Rob Gruber i wish i could tell you iwishicouldtellyou.com

Absolute Positivity Journaling

Journaling 103 – Absolute Positivity Journaling – Stage 3

The goal today is to introduce you to Positivity Journaling.

Before you begin, write in the inside cover of your new Positivity Journal the following:

These are the things…
I am grateful for.
I appreciate.
I am thankful for.
I love.
I like.
I imagine.
I respect.
I adore.
I aspire to.
I dream of.
I visualize.
I wish for.

I look forward to.
I think are wonderful and positive.
(Feel free to add or alter this list!)

1) Pick a time and a place where you can sit and not be distracted for 10-30 minutes.

2) Get quiet, close your eyes and breath, letting go of all the resistance in your body.

2) Now open your journal to the inside cover and read “These are the things…” a couple times.

3) Begin to write with your first impulse. You don’t have to rush. Let it come to you. It will. Just sit still and listen to your heart. If nothing comes, fine. Thirty minutes of silence is a wonderful thing. If you get inspired and can’t stop writing, don’t stop.

4)You can write on one thing for the entire period of time or a dozen. It doesn’t have to be profound or grammatically correct. There are no rules. Simply align with your positive intention and have fun.

5) Should a negative feeling come up, simply recognize it, and say to yourself “NEW THOUGHT” and move on.

6) When your time is up, STOP. Close the book and thank yourself for allowing yourself the time for this positive experience.

7) Do this type of journaling on a daily basis. Feel free to look back and read from your positivity journal whenever you feel the desire.

Copyright 2007 Rob Gruber  iwishicouldtellyou.com   i wish i could tell you

“It’s the journal not the dissertation.”

Journaling 102 – Placing Your Focus – STAGE 2

The second present moment journal exercise I would like you to do involves focusing on an external object that interests you in a public place you feel comfortable in.

The goal of this journal exercise is to increase your ability to focus (stay present) in an external environment.

1) Go to a public place you enjoy, somewhere where you can sit and not be bothered for 10 to 30 minutes, like a park, an art museum, a café with music, a mall or a bookstore.

2) Pick one thing in that space that you find interesting and journal on it. It can be a tree, a painting, a cup of coffee, a chair or anything that will be in your presence for the allotted time period.

3) Keep your focus on that object, and that object only. Use as many of your senses as you are able.

4) Write in great detail everything about your object. Paint a picture in words. Focus. Write. Focus. If you stray, write your stray thoughts, but return as soon as you can, back to the object you are focusing on.

5) Do not judge what you are writing. Simply write.

6) When your time is up, stop, close your book, and go about your day.

7) Do this regularly to increase your ability to stay focused, present, in an external environment.

Copyright 2006 Rob Gruber

A journal of a thousand pages…

“A journal of a thousand pages begins with a single word.” – gruber

JOURNALING 101 – WRITING WITHOUT JUDGEMENT – STAGE 1

One of the exercises that I have my clients do, to stay as present as possible, is to start a journal. A journal can be a life-changing and eye-opening experience.

The biggest question I get about journaling is, “How do I start?”

1) SET A TIME AND PLACE WHERE YOU CAN GO TO BE ALONE AND WRITE EVERYDAY
(10-30 minutes)

2) BEGIN TO WRITE
Close your eyes and breathe. Open your eyes to your journal, sit with pen in hand and wait for your first impulse. If all you can think of is, “I don’t know where to start.” Write that! And keep writing that until something else fills your mind. Something will.

3) DON’T JUDGE OR EVEN THINK ABOUT THE WORDS/THOUGHTS YOU ARE WRITING.

4) SIMPLY WIRTE YOUR THOUGHTS OUT AS YOU FOCUS ON THE POINT OF THE PEN ON THE PAPER.

5) WHEN YOUR TIME IS UP, STOP, close your journal and go about youyr day.

5) DO NOT GO BACK AND READ IT.

6) WHEN YOU FILL YOUR BOOK, SIMPLY START A NEW ONE. FOR THIS EXERCISE YOU NEED NEVER LOOK BACK AT YOUR WRITING.

Copyright 2007 Rob Gruber